Two little words

Think a minute…A husband and wife were so angry at each other that they had not spoken for days. On the 5th day the husband realized he had a problem. He needed his wife to wake him up early the next morning to catch a plane for an important business trip. But stubbornly he still did not want to talk to her, so he put a note on the table that read: “Please wake me at 5 AM tomorrow morning.”  The next morning when the husband woke up it was 7 o’clock! He was furious that he had missed his plane. Just when he was just about to yell at his wife for not waking him, he found a written note next to his bed that read: “Wake up! It’s 5 AM!” They chose to go through all of that rather than simply say, “I’m sorry.”

We humans are usually better at remembering the people who should tell us they’re sorry than remembering the people to whom we should apologize.  Yet if we simply did it sooner we could save our family relationships and friendships much needless pain and time. A British study showed that 37% of people who had sued doctors or hospitals in court would not have done so if their doctor had simply said, “I’m sorry.” 

When it comes to taking the blame for something, most people fall into one of two groups. The first group never thinks they caused the problem. They think it is always the other person’s fault. They continually deceive themselves into believing the lie they are not responsible for the problems, pain or tension around them. “Those kinds of people don’t get ulcers, they just give them!” They don’t lose a minute of sleep at night over the pain they have caused others. But their “ignorance is not bliss” for the people they hurt.

The second group is the opposite in that they have such a caring heart and conscience, they feel guilty even when they are not the person who is wrong and responsible for the problem. But either extreme of always being a “blame taker” or “blame shifter” is not healthy, because it is not based on the true facts.  The key in each situation is to be honest, responsible and forgiving. Often both sides are wrong in some way and help cause the hurt or misunderstanding, so it will take both of you to admit it and fix it. Jesus promises that if we will give Him complete charge of our heart, He will help us start seeing and understanding ourselves clearly, honestly and responsibly, so we will know when and how to apologize in each situation. Only Jesus can genuinely humble and change our heart, as well as our way of treating people. He is the only One Who can help us genuinely forgive those people who have wronged us, so we can become free from our dangerous, destructive sin of unforgiveness. Just think a minute…

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