Disappointed with myself

Think a minute…Ever since I can remember, I have been disappointed with myself. Among other things I wish I was taller, and that I had more mechanical ability to fix things.  

But other disappointments in myself are much more important. I wish I was a better husband and father. In certain areas I should have been a better example to my children. I wish I would have been more patient with them. I wish I could take my hurtful words and moments back, but I can’t.  

It’s not just my role as a husband and father. I’m also disappointed with myself as a son, a brother, a friend, a worker, and human being in general. I think of the day I was born and given the gift of an entire life to live well—the gift given to all of us when we’re born. I think of what I could have become. The ways I could have developed my character, my mind, my relationships, and the joy I did not always give to others, because I did not always make the very best choices and live up to my potential. 

If we are honest, in some way we all are disappointed with ourselves. Deep down we know we have not become the best person we can be and lived the life we could and should. But how do we all know this? Where does this disappointment come from? 

Some might say that we simply lack self-esteem and don’t accept ourselves the way we are. But that still cannot explain the fact that all human beings of all cultures throughout history universally and naturally know that we have not always lived the way we should. The clear, obvious answer is we all have done wrong things and failed to be what we know we could, and our conscience simply lets us know it. Our disappointment with ourselves is our natural, deep desire to simply be the person we were designed to be. But the good news is: “With my Creator’s help, I will become myself.”  

It is a fact of life that until we come home to the One Who made us and loves us more than anyone, we will hopelessly continue living in dis-appointment—missing the life we were appointed to live and enjoy. But it’s not too late! Once and for all, won’t you ask Jesus to forgive you for living your own wrong way, and to take total control of your heart and life. That is the only way you can begin life all over again; but this time, with Him in full charge, He can start making you into a new person—the one He created you to be. Just think a minute…

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