Marriage in debt

Think a minute…Remember the wonderful promises you made on your wedding day?  “I promise to always love you, care for you, respect and cherish you, through everything we face in life, whether we are rich or poor, sick or healthy.” But since your wedding day, you found out those promises are much easier said than done! 

If we are completely honest, most of the time what we really mean by those beautiful promises on our wedding day is:  “I want to be happy in life, and I believe you are the one who is going to make me happy.”

Most of us actually get married more for what we can get than for what we can give. So when you have two people in a marriage who are taking more than they are giving, no one is happy. Many of us live life believing our mate owes us a debt to make us happy. So when we married them we expected them to “pay up”! 

But when the honeymoon was over, you probably learned that your wife or husband is not quite perfect. They are not always meeting up to your expectations and making you happy. Of course, we should always be trying to put each other’s needs first.

We should always be improving and becoming more sensitive, kind and quick to forgive each other. But none of us has what it takes to totally satisfy all of our wife’s or husband’s needs for every area of life every day.

So we can never pay this impossible debt that we might expect from each other. We humans simply do not have that kind of love that never fails! Love that always puts your wife’s or husband’s needs first. Love that always forgives and accepts them no matter how much they disappoint and hurt you. 

No one understands our need for real love better than our own Maker. In fact, He is the only one who has this kind of love. This is why He created us to enjoy a daily, close relationship with Him. So the only way our marriage relationship can ever be what we need and want it to be, is if our relationship with our Maker is what it is supposed to be.

God is the only one who can satisfy all your needs for real, lasting love and happiness. Then you can start becoming the husband or wife your mate needs you to be. 

As you start learning to love and accept your wife or husband without conditions, that is what will make them want to change and become a better wife or husband to you. Today, won’t you ask Jesus to take full control of your heart, character and marriage? Through you, He can start filling your marriage with the kind of love and satisfaction you want to enjoy for the rest of your life together. Just think a minute…

Samoa Observer

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