There’s a reason

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Layton Lolo

Blood is thicker than water

But I feel like my blood is polluted

Plagued by the many problems in my life

It hurts as it runs through my veins

I am lost

I am alone

 

I am not what I appear

I am a puzzle missing a piece

A lover with no heart

A wonderer with nowhere to go

A singer without a song

A lunatic with no voices in my head

 

I am not the person I want to be

I am friends with the monsters under my bed

But I’m afraid to face my inner demons

I am a poet with more passion than the next

But I never right my true feelings

I’m both myself and a stranger all at once

 

Nightmares are familiar to me

Dreams are in my fantasy

Pain is an old friend

Comfort just hasn’t made it home yet

The past hurts and the future haunts me

But the present is a bit of both

 

Sorrow abides where my heart should be

Regret is what I eat, sleep, and breathe everyday

Happiness is a faint memory of what used to be

It began with realization of the world I lived in

Then it continued to experiences

And then onto worries and doubts

 

Now I see foe where friend once was

I feel doubt and despair where hope should thrive

Where I felt the need to respect and love

I now feel the need to pity and regret

Lullabies are what I search for

To hush me to sleep and comfort me

 

But I keep remembering too much;

A brother’s sins coming to light

My mistakes surfacing to quickly

Hope, love, and motivation dissolving from my life

I now fear it is too much of a burden

Yet I keep repeating to myself, “It is all for a reason.”

 

Have you ever been on a roller coaster before?  The usual experience you get out of such a ride is one to remember.  First you might feel a little light headed and queasy when you get in your seat and begin the climb up the railing.  Then before you fall or pass the summit of the climb to reach the decent, you may feel almost a pause; a stillness before wind and screams fill your ears.  By this point you might feel frightened, excited, adrenaline, or what you might call ‘a rush’ depending on how you are.  For some that get frightened, they often tend to think rather crazy thoughts; like the possibility of the roller coaster falling of the railing and you all die or their seat comes loose and they fall out and die or the roller coaster gets stuck on one of the loops and pauses in an up-side-down position and you all scream for hours and hours before anyone can get you down.

Life is often referred to roller coaster rides because of its twists, turns, and fast accelerating attributes.  And it is usually at the metaphorical twists and turns of life that we often find and stumble into something we might wish we hadn’t.  Trials and tribulations are what lie at these turns we make our way to in life but getting through them is a ride all on its own.

At this point we, like the frightened passengers of a roller coaster begin to worry and panic because we don’t know what will happen.  But what they don’t know is that what their feeling is what the creators of the roller coaster wanted; they wanted to make the coaster a ride to remember while given them the protection and ability to get to the end a little shaken and spooked but unharmed.

And that is how it is in life.  We are put here in this life to enjoy the ride while learning growing and experiencing what will help us later on in our life.  But the trials we face are for a reason.  Our Heavenly Father and creator wanted us to face such problems in order to learn and grow.

Some often say that the trials and problems they have are too much for them and that it isn’t fair.  Well here is a little knowledge to you reader that everyone should know; God does give us challenges that are hard and difficult for us but he does not give us more than we can handle.

So from now on when you face a problem, try to learn from it and remember the words, “It’s all for a reason.”

© Samoa Observer 2016

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