Marriage medicine (Part 1)

Think a minute…A divorced husband and wife said: “We broke up because of illness in the family: we got sick of each other.” Sadly, the oldest living institution of humanity is experiencing an epidemic of sickness that is infecting and destroying the lives of millions of couples and their children.

Furthermore, many of the couples who stay together still have not learned how to have a healthy, happy relationship. Today and tomorrow we will look at some of the unhealthy conditions in marriage, and then prescribe some medicines to heal and strengthen our marriage for a satisfying life together.  

The first deadly disease in marriages is selfishness. “Many marriage problems are caused by the marriage of two people who are in love…with themselves.” This is the husband who sees his wife as the one who gives him what he wants as a cook, cleaner, and lover.

He likes to show her off like a new car, but when her paint fades and her engine slows down, he wants to trade her in for a new model. This selfish, childish kind of thinking does not know what mature, manly love is. Love and marriage is “for men only” who are strong enough to put the needs of their wife first. 

In the same way, a selfish and domineering wife can take her women’s liberation too far by not respecting and treating her husband as the man of the house. As one husband said, “My wife is the nicest guy you’ll ever meet!” A bossy, unkind, critical wife will gradually tear down her husband’s self-confidence, and then rob him and their children of their respect for him as their father. Her daily disrespecting of him continues cutting him down to make him less of a man instead of more of a man.

Sadly, “Some wives work so hard to make good husbands they don’t make better wives.” This kind of wife needs to take a long, honest look at herself to clearly see her own wrong heart and character faults.

A second marriage sickness is busyness. In many marriages both the husband and wife have full-time careers. Even stay-at-home mothers are extremely busy with their children’s schooling, housekeeping, paying bills, cooking, and countless other duties.

So when the husband goes out with the boys after work instead of coming home, couples have even less time to be alone with each other and keep their relationship close, strong, and satisfying.  

Today, whatever your marriage problem may be, won’t you ask the Creator of love and marriage to start healing your relationship with your mate. Then ask Him to start changing your heart, so you can become the life partner your husband or wife needs. Just think a minute… 

Samoa Observer

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